Pure Athlete

I am just now getting over the fact that last weekend's NCAA Tournament games were incredibly boring. Only the last game (Davidson vs. Kansas) had any type of drama. I have never been one to follow Bill Self's teams but after watching that game it was obvious why he had never been to the Final Four before now. He is not very good. Without question he coached that game "not-to-lose" as opposed to trying to win it outright. It made for a dramatic ending so I suppose I should thank him for finding a way to coach his absurdly talented team in a way that nearly left them out of a star-studded Final Four. As sad as it is to admit, the most entertaining part of the weekend was in the very first game of the weekend, Washington State vs. North Carolina. Aside from the fact that this game was over within the first 15 minutes Jay Bilas was able to provide some phenomenal insight.

You see, Washington State is not the sexiest or most athletic team in the world but they are well-coached and play smart basketball. Pretty much the exact opposite description of an Oregon basketball team but that's not the point. One player on Washington State who fits the "not-the-most-athletic-looking-guy" mold is Taylor Rochestie. He is white, has floppy hair and wears knee-length socks. Over the last couple of years I have found him to be a pretty effective ballplayer though and Bilas agrees. At one point in the first half Bilas said about Rochestie, "A much better athlete than he gets credit for. He can dunk off two feet with two hands with ease." Well, there you have it. Rochestie is a modern day Bruce Jenner. You're to tell me a college basketball player can do that and be a student at the same time? I need to see footage of Rochestie pulling off the miraculous feat to believe it myself.

Bilas' comments were not outlandish but I was waiting for something really good to nail home the point that Rochestie is quite an athlete. In my mind I was waiting for Bilas to say something like he can dunk off two feet from near the free throw line and put it between his legs. That would have made the suspense worth it. Instead he told me that Rochestie can dunk, which makes him far more athletic than I but a likely reason why he wears his socks so high.

Daylight Savings Recovery

Well, today was the second day of daylight savings and I must say I have adjusted. According to Renee McCullough of KMTR in Eugene I am a resilient individual. On Saturday night she mentioned a study that found it takes some people up to two weeks to recover! That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. The people with that type of response must be Oregon State graduates because that is pathetic. Word of advice to Renee, sight the study and drop actual names of people that performed it because by simply mentioning a study I think she did some research on herself and realized she is not that good at sleeping, life or something. Also, there is no need to throw in that tidbit because just a couple of weeks ago the local paper had a front-page, above the fold article bragging that Oregon is the most agnostic state in the Union. So if the viewing audience has no reason to wake up there is no way 'losing' an hour of sleep should have any effect.

You know, I act like I am some super human because I have recovered so quickly but the church I go to has us delay changing our clocks until after service so I cheated. There is no doubt that if I had to 'lose' the hour of sleep I would have had to take sick leave for the entire week. The more I think about it Renee may have found something. Everyone that takes a flight from Utah to California has to take into account the fact that they will not be functional for a few days. Those people that take trips one time zone away are all too familiar with jet lag on those adventures. How do business people do one-night trips? I'll bet their employers provide complimentary mental help because of the incredible challenge of dealing with frequent one-hour time changes.

Playing For The Win

ESPN was nice enough to provide 'bonus coverage' yesterday of the UConn (I have been on their jock for about 3 weeks now, watch for them to advance in the Tourney) and South Florida. The game was being played in South Florida so I'm not sure if the broadcasters were a part of USF or UConn. If forced to guess I would say UConn since they actually have a team that's good enough to have its own ESPN Plus agreement. That is not all that important though. What is important is that the rules of basketball must have changed since my decorated days in junior high school. I missed the part where a one-point field goal was added to the rules. Why do I say this? Well, a broadcaster asked a question to his partner that leads me to believe one-point field goals are possible.

With UConn leading 72-71 and 19.7 seconds remaining in the game the broadcaster asked, "What do you do, go for the win?" I went crazy and railed on this guy immediately so I was not able to get the reaction to such an insightful question. Needless to say, USF went for the win and made a daring two-point shot. Stan Heath, USF's coach, has huge balls for calling such a play when everyone in the building knew a one-pointer would send the game into overtime. The only problem is that UConn had enough time to make a buzzer beater so Heath's strategic genius was not rewarded.

Ridnour Played 4 Years At Oregon

It has been nearly a week since I heard this but it still bothers me so I had to mention it. As this season has gone on for the Oregon basketball team people have been up and down with the guard play. One day the guards are young and inexperienced and the next day they are playing really well due to excellent coaching. During nearly every broadcast the local broadcasters remind the viewers that Aaron Brooks and Luke Ridnour struggled in their first season as well. I’m not sure I totally agree with comparing Ridnour to the current point guards but that’s not the point.

During the California-Berkeley game on Saturday the esteemed Rob Kloss said something to the effect of, “Brooks and Ridnour did not come into their own until their senior seasons.” I did in fact rewind the TiVo to make sure I heard that right and I did. Of course, I do not dispute the Brooks part of that but I question why Ridnour has to be mentioned. The primary reason being he left for the NBA after his junior year. A senior year he never played. Does Kloss forget the epic Elite Eight run during Rid’s sophomore season? I am fired up for the next OSN broadcast because I am certain I will have something to write about.

Ballets Are Gross

I like basketball but I love football. With no meaningful football last weekend and only one game remaining (I won’t call it the Super Bowl so that the NFL can’t sue me.) I’m stuck surrendering the TV to my wife. As a result, I was lucky enough to watch some figure skating over the weekend. In the spirit of full disclosure, I actually went to the U.S. Figure Skating Championships with my family when they were held in Washington, D.C. a while back. I am proud to admit that I fell asleep within 30 minutes of arriving and did not wake up until we left.

Okay, back to this weekend. A great part of a figure skating broadcast is the announcing. The announcers say some of the craziest things and do it while talking in a soft voice as if talking normal really matters. What I heard on Saturday night floored me. In fact, I was grossed out. It was spoken as if it was not a big deal. My wife didn’t even think it was that bad. Maybe it’s a gender thing.

I never got the name of the lady that said this but she was the only lady in the booth. As a teenage girl was prancing on the ice she flippantly noted, “The ballet is about a man that inadvertently falls in love with a doll.” Of course I know it isn’t a true story, I think, but what demented mind would think to write an entire ballet on that topic?

D1 Players Were Good In High School

Living in the great state of Oregon I am privy to many broadcasts of UO sports via the Oregon Sports Network. Now, this is not a national network so I am usually more entertained by what the announcers say than what is actually being shown. This does not mean I don't like the Ducks, it's just that the quality of announcing is something else. Last night OSN broadcast the Ducks pathetic loss to the Washington Huskies. The analyst behind the mic was none other than Rob Kloss, a former Duck if I'm not mistaken. Now I'm sure he is a great guy and is successful in whatever line of work he is in but as an analyst he is pure comedy. I did not hear any legendary lines last night but he did have a line that is worthy of a mention.

When Kloss was talking about Venoy Overton, a freshman guard for the Huskies, he so eloquently analyzed, "He was a great high school player in high school." Well, thanks for that tidbit, I'll be sure to remember that next time I see him playing really well.

Broadcaster Brilliance

I realize I have tried to start some regular columns on this here blog and not had the greatest success being diligent on continuing them. Upset Special and The OpinionSmith Ivy League come to mind. Well, perhaps the third time is the charm. With all of the sports I watch (I watch sports like it's my job) I hear some funny and outrageous things from broadcasters. It is in the interest of others that I share those with you so that you can gain enjoyment from their brilliance, just as I do.

The first 'Broadcaster Brilliance' comes from Patrick McEnroe at the Australian Open. Early in James Blake's match McEnroe noted, "His mom is here today. I saw her roaming the grounds."

(Photo from the UN.)